The Strangest Gig I've ever done

7 years of doing gigs on and off,
and today's gig ranks right up there as the strangest one i've ever done.

i've had my fair share of bad gigs,
but this one blew me away.

everything that could go wrong,
went wrong.

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everything abt this gig was strange.
i've never felt as stressed and panicky as i did to prepare for this one.
the amt of stress and preparation involved was way disproportional to the event and payment.

it really wasn't any big event,
and the payment was normal,
and even my mom told me yesterday
"for this amount of money, if you're gonna be so stressed, i'd rather you not take it up"

i figured it was because this is the first time i really tried my hand at a "production",
and i really wanted it to work.

besides, this was also the first time i planned a FULL 15 minute routine,
one with no talking at all.
If you grab a volunteer and play little games and make small talk,
15 minutes is not that hard.
but do a full routine,
and most of us would do a 3 minute one,
with the skillful ones maybe maxing it at 5 minute.

15 minutes without talking is really testing your ability to hold the audience's attention.

i actually had that sinking feeling yesterday,
the kind you get the day before an exam you haven't finished studying for.

and the thought of bailing out seriously crossed my mind,
more seriously than i've ever felt.

But as a performer you can never bail out.
it isn't an option.

so i bit the bullet and continued,
quietly reminding myself to "finish the vision"

while reminding myself, again, not to think it out of proportion.

"if it works, great. if it bombs, scram. at least you don't know anyone in there."

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in yet another itchy backside move,
i decided to make this thing biblical.

i didn't outrightly put God in it,
but i quoted bits and pieces from the bible.

and to be honest i wasn't completely comfortable.
i had a nagging feeling that this was my own initiative and not God's.
i wasn't sure.
but i think maybe now i am, on hindsight.

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So, after a week of stress and 2 nights of shallow sleep,
i finally got my routine out and running.
the stage looked great too,
everything was there for the taking.

one problem was that the organisers were too young and inexperienced.
they did start a company,
and the director was probably below 20.

i admired their drive and passion,
but there just wasn't enough organisation,
and true enough,
the sound and visual effects, so integral to my show, failed from the start.

it took all of 15 minutes to fix the sound and background effects,
by using my backup CD.

and for all of 15 minutes,
the audience sat waiting in the dark (haha),
because i used lighted props and asked them to switch the lights off.

after the sound and visuals started working,
it was time for my props to fail me.

1) the stage guy mispositioned all my props on stage.

2) the candles i used wouldn't light up, destroying the effect i wanted to create.

3) the lightsticks i used for poi didn't work. i needed them to break and glow on stage for my effect, so i couldn't try them before hand. i had to work by faith. and they failed lor.

4) one lightstick did manage to glow, but the handle broke.

5) i hurriedly changed the poi to the other lightsticks (i always have backups), and the poi CHAIN broke!

how the poi chain can break is beyond me.
it's METAL.

in my first routine,
the lighted poi played a huge role.

there was thus a huge gap of the audience probably not knowing at all what i was doing on stage.

thankfully the rest of the show went ok.
at the rate it was going, i didn't want to juggle knives over the volunteer,
but thankfully i didn't drop it on him.

and yes,
i didn't have time to do my costume makeup in the toilet,
so i garang-ly did my make up in the dressing room with no mirror.

NEVER do costume makeup without a mirror.
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the sequence of events is horrifying.
right after the 15 minute delay, the audience watch me struggle with the candle, and then they see me whacking glow sticks that wouldn't glow, then they see the glow sticks flying off the chain, then they wonder what i'm doing on stage trying desperately to do poi without poi chains.

For a full 5 minute, i bet they had no idea what i was doing.
i was surprised i could continue with all these mishaps. the show must go on. do poi without poi chains.

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i am almost embarassed to be paid for the gig.

I am now genuinely thankful that:

1) the failure was so spectacular i don't really feel upset, i am more puzzled
2) no one i knew was in the audience. i invited shereen and angie to come video tape me but one was rushing her assignment and angie fell ill.
3) the audience and orgainsers were all young, friendly and supportive, so the damage is controlled.

i dun actually think my idea failed.
i still think it has potential,
and when executed well it will be so beautiful,
but i'll probably hold it off for a while.

if my METAL poi chain can break,
then God must be trying to tell me something.

this is SO strange.