"Let me know tell you something," she said abruptly, "don't waste your youth."
"what don't waste my youth? what you want me to do?" i asked, bemused.
~Don't Waste Your Youth~
that line keeps ringing in my ears
the bane of being a lady is we get depressed every month
for no real rhyme or reason (some say it's really just hormones)
we get depressed over small trivial things
and a few days later you wonder why such a silly small thing got to you
but maybe, just maybe
these small silly things are sub-conscious concerns that usually get buried
and during that period of depression all these buried concerns surface with a vengence
---------------------------------------------
have been working late a lot again
i don't mind it at all
but i noticed that i'm starting to shelve off things i wanted to get done outside work
the interest in getting those things done just waned down as i put more energy into working
i see this trend continuing
and then one day i'll wake up and realise i'm too old to do all these things i've been shelving
and i'll get mid life crisis and dye my hair blond and get a boob job to console myself
it's frightening
it's hard to decide what is worth doing and what is not
when i'm free i can think of things i want to do for the heck of it
when i'm busy, it's hard to get the drive to do things for the heck of it
i really just want to sleep and rest when i have the time
but then what is the worth of being busy
maybe i should not think and just do
but time waits for no man
one day the words "it's too late now" is going to hit me hard
"don't waste your youth", she advised
that line keeps ringing
constantly
blardy hormones.
--------------------------------------------------
a cockroach is on the prowl somewhere
almost managed to usher it out the front door
should have slammed the door shut and push it out
but there's a chance i might crush it at my doorway
i don't relish a crushed cockroach greeting me at the door everyday
it's disappeared into the washing machine closet area
hopefully it went down the water pipeway or something
don't see it anymore
but looking over my shoulder constantly to make sure it's not sneaking up on me
blardy cockroach.
------------------------------------------------------
Dilbert's World
the past few weeks have been interesting at work
office interpersonal dynamics can be very cartoon if you step back and just observe
they told me, semi-jokingly, that "meetings are really just occasions for the upper management to hear themselves speak" and "nothing comes out of meetings except heat and entropy".
AH had a conference meeting he had no interest in whatsoever and as i walked into the room i saw him sitting alone in front of the speaker phone looking bored and concentrating on munching his doughnut more than anything. it was a funny sight.
so the project i'm in is pretty messy currently. therefore the long hours. basically on our side we demanded something needed to be done to improve the situation. Half the department in the other company agreed and the other half wanted something else, and so they're topsy turvy engaging in some massive office politcs over there.
so someone from over there will come one week and say do Plan A and then the following week someone else will come over and say do Plan B.
we asked GB if we could get the plan A guy and the Plan B guy to come TOGETHER so we can stop flip flopping week by week. GB initially thought that was a good idea until she realised it really isn't grand if the 2 guys started fighting and we have to get security in to haul our customers out the door.
it was that bad.
it's funny watching intelligent grown/old men taking things so personally. From a project point of view it was not beneficial because both sides had good points but they're so aggravated with each other they stop listening and co-operating with each other.
i told W the problem is with male ego and the solution is to hire more women.
"hire more women?? ok, think of Tina. you think if she disagrees with you, she won't fight it out with you?? she will kick your ass."
"hmm. i guess you're right. fine think of it this way, it's more interesting watching women fight than old men fight. the screaming is higher pitched and there may even be a catfight."
----------------------------------------
so AH came in this week in battle mode.
the first line he said in the early morning was "i'm pissed off".
he was in full battle gear shooting lines at me like "so you want to do things your way don't you" and "we have to do all these un-necessary things now, because you started it" and "i expect you all to be more intelligent about these things...."
i must admit i got pretty upset. i've always kept my arguments objective and scientific and logical and i felt so maligned when he accused me of something that was not my idea but the Plan A guy's idea. basically they got themselves wrapped in the political thingy and i'm getting pulled into it. and i refrained from being defensive because i wanted to keep out of their politics as much as i could. all i want is to tackle the issues in a logical manner without these un-necessary emotions.
it was very upsetting. GB told me to call her if i needed to because AH has the right to be peeved but he has no right to rant and rave and be unprofessional.
it was times like those that you start wondering why bother. i begun to think maybe i should be like master archer. just don't do anything. don't be proactive. less trouble, less things to do, less heat. issues tend to get resolved over time anyway.
W told me as long as i was doing my job, i'm doing the right thing.
Lukckily AH calmed down a lot later in the day and for the rest of the week. in fact he was so calm and pale and tired-looking, i was worried he'd collapse.
I think the only thing that kept me going was my faith that he was a reasonable guy at the end of the day. when he's peeved he holds to his veiws stubbornly and shuts out everyone else's points of view. but show him he's wrong, and he'll relent.
it took incredible patience, but he did relent. (pat on the back for me)
(later i found that maybe i am wrong on one of the issues and he is right. so much for my patient persuasion. but by digging deep into the issue we uncovered some new info, so maybe not so pai-sei.)
-------------------------------------------------
The Gods Must be Kidding
1. This year has been the dryest year over the last few years. On the one day it rained in months, my car wiper blades broke.
2. The Singapore side has some equipment to sent to alabama. In august when i was at the singapore company, the engineer of this project was desperately trying to repair the faulty equipment. it's old and there're defects galore and they kept struggling to keep it alive.
the equpment is finally fully functional after 3 months of debugging. they sent it over to alabama by ship. The equipment dropped into the sea. All of them will be replaced with new equipment paid for by insurance.
----------------------------------------
i'm tired. thank God it's friday.
"what don't waste my youth? what you want me to do?" i asked, bemused.
~Don't Waste Your Youth~
that line keeps ringing in my ears
the bane of being a lady is we get depressed every month
for no real rhyme or reason (some say it's really just hormones)
we get depressed over small trivial things
and a few days later you wonder why such a silly small thing got to you
but maybe, just maybe
these small silly things are sub-conscious concerns that usually get buried
and during that period of depression all these buried concerns surface with a vengence
---------------------------------------------
have been working late a lot again
i don't mind it at all
but i noticed that i'm starting to shelve off things i wanted to get done outside work
the interest in getting those things done just waned down as i put more energy into working
i see this trend continuing
and then one day i'll wake up and realise i'm too old to do all these things i've been shelving
and i'll get mid life crisis and dye my hair blond and get a boob job to console myself
it's frightening
it's hard to decide what is worth doing and what is not
when i'm free i can think of things i want to do for the heck of it
when i'm busy, it's hard to get the drive to do things for the heck of it
i really just want to sleep and rest when i have the time
but then what is the worth of being busy
maybe i should not think and just do
but time waits for no man
one day the words "it's too late now" is going to hit me hard
"don't waste your youth", she advised
that line keeps ringing
constantly
blardy hormones.
--------------------------------------------------
a cockroach is on the prowl somewhere
almost managed to usher it out the front door
should have slammed the door shut and push it out
but there's a chance i might crush it at my doorway
i don't relish a crushed cockroach greeting me at the door everyday
it's disappeared into the washing machine closet area
hopefully it went down the water pipeway or something
don't see it anymore
but looking over my shoulder constantly to make sure it's not sneaking up on me
blardy cockroach.
------------------------------------------------------
Dilbert's World
the past few weeks have been interesting at work
office interpersonal dynamics can be very cartoon if you step back and just observe
they told me, semi-jokingly, that "meetings are really just occasions for the upper management to hear themselves speak" and "nothing comes out of meetings except heat and entropy".
AH had a conference meeting he had no interest in whatsoever and as i walked into the room i saw him sitting alone in front of the speaker phone looking bored and concentrating on munching his doughnut more than anything. it was a funny sight.
so the project i'm in is pretty messy currently. therefore the long hours. basically on our side we demanded something needed to be done to improve the situation. Half the department in the other company agreed and the other half wanted something else, and so they're topsy turvy engaging in some massive office politcs over there.
so someone from over there will come one week and say do Plan A and then the following week someone else will come over and say do Plan B.
we asked GB if we could get the plan A guy and the Plan B guy to come TOGETHER so we can stop flip flopping week by week. GB initially thought that was a good idea until she realised it really isn't grand if the 2 guys started fighting and we have to get security in to haul our customers out the door.
it was that bad.
it's funny watching intelligent grown/old men taking things so personally. From a project point of view it was not beneficial because both sides had good points but they're so aggravated with each other they stop listening and co-operating with each other.
i told W the problem is with male ego and the solution is to hire more women.
"hire more women?? ok, think of Tina. you think if she disagrees with you, she won't fight it out with you?? she will kick your ass."
"hmm. i guess you're right. fine think of it this way, it's more interesting watching women fight than old men fight. the screaming is higher pitched and there may even be a catfight."
----------------------------------------
so AH came in this week in battle mode.
the first line he said in the early morning was "i'm pissed off".
he was in full battle gear shooting lines at me like "so you want to do things your way don't you" and "we have to do all these un-necessary things now, because you started it" and "i expect you all to be more intelligent about these things...."
i must admit i got pretty upset. i've always kept my arguments objective and scientific and logical and i felt so maligned when he accused me of something that was not my idea but the Plan A guy's idea. basically they got themselves wrapped in the political thingy and i'm getting pulled into it. and i refrained from being defensive because i wanted to keep out of their politics as much as i could. all i want is to tackle the issues in a logical manner without these un-necessary emotions.
it was very upsetting. GB told me to call her if i needed to because AH has the right to be peeved but he has no right to rant and rave and be unprofessional.
it was times like those that you start wondering why bother. i begun to think maybe i should be like master archer. just don't do anything. don't be proactive. less trouble, less things to do, less heat. issues tend to get resolved over time anyway.
W told me as long as i was doing my job, i'm doing the right thing.
Lukckily AH calmed down a lot later in the day and for the rest of the week. in fact he was so calm and pale and tired-looking, i was worried he'd collapse.
I think the only thing that kept me going was my faith that he was a reasonable guy at the end of the day. when he's peeved he holds to his veiws stubbornly and shuts out everyone else's points of view. but show him he's wrong, and he'll relent.
it took incredible patience, but he did relent. (pat on the back for me)
(later i found that maybe i am wrong on one of the issues and he is right. so much for my patient persuasion. but by digging deep into the issue we uncovered some new info, so maybe not so pai-sei.)
-------------------------------------------------
The Gods Must be Kidding
1. This year has been the dryest year over the last few years. On the one day it rained in months, my car wiper blades broke.
2. The Singapore side has some equipment to sent to alabama. In august when i was at the singapore company, the engineer of this project was desperately trying to repair the faulty equipment. it's old and there're defects galore and they kept struggling to keep it alive.
the equpment is finally fully functional after 3 months of debugging. they sent it over to alabama by ship. The equipment dropped into the sea. All of them will be replaced with new equipment paid for by insurance.
----------------------------------------
i'm tired. thank God it's friday.
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